Lois A. Steury

Lois Audrey Steury was a woman who devoted her life to making a difference in the lives of others. She succeeded in so many ways, as a beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend and as a longtime Occupational Therapist and home health Nurses Aide. More than anything, Lois was a woman who always gave of herself willingly, graciously, and selflessly, and taught others to do the same. Loiss story began on a chilly fall day in 1931, after the leaves had turned and just a couple of weeks before Halloween in the town of Highland Park, Michigan. On October 16, 1931, John and Kathleen Manchee celebrated the birth of a beautiful baby girl, a daughter they named Lois. Lois was joined by her brother Bob in 1934 and they put down roots in Royal Oak, Michigan where her dad was a pharmacist. As it turned out, during this Great Depression, being a pharmacist allowed her father to continue to provide a somewhat steady income during a time when the unemployment rate was a shocking 16.3% and when nearly 13 million men were out of work across our great nation. Lois attended Royal Oak High School and, although she was always shy about admitting it later in life, she was voted to the Homecoming Queens Court during her senior year. After graduating in 1949 and taking some needed time off to get a job to help the family pay some bills, she enrolled at Wayne State University, where she earned her Bachelor of Science degree in Occupational Therapy in 1958. Then, through a blind date set-up by one of her good friends, she met and later married Joel Douglas Steury on August 19, 1958. They eventually settled in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Shortly thereafter, she and Joel were blessed with two bouncing baby boys, Warren and Bill, who brought them much happiness as well as the normal challenges that any two high-energy young boys can offer. Lois became a homemaker to care for the now growing family, with Joel supporting them as a teacher in the Rockford School System. Sadly, she and Joel made the very difficult decision to divorce in 1966, resulting in her and the boys relocating from Grand Rapids to Muskegon, Michigan with the challenge now of raising her young family as a single parent. Joel, the loving father that he was, remained a very active and loving influence throughout the boys upbringing. Now back in the workforce but not yet satisfied with her educational achievements, Lois attended Western Michigan University and earned her Masters Degree in Special Education for the Emotionally Impaired in 1967. She worked in the Muskegon County School System applying her Occupational Therapist skills to the learning disabled, emotionally and physically impaired pre-schoolers as well as with early intervention programs for children 0-3 years old. Lois was now in her element, applying her talents in a profession she truly enjoyed. The family did much together over the years and their vacations were always memorable. As an example, their trip with a planned destination of Washington D.C. ended up in a parking lot of a Lansing Dodge dealer. The minivan had broken down, it was Sunday, and they had to wait for the dealer to open on Monday to get the van fixed. Not dismayed, the boys broke out the inflatable raft and headed off for some water fun at a nearby pond they even tried their luck at fishing. The minivan didnt fare so well, having to be towed back home. This certainly ended up being a shortened vacation but one full of fond memories. With her sons now entering Fruitport High School, Lois made the wise decision to move into the Village of Fruitport in 1973, within walking distance of the school. Here, she could support all the school-related activities that were now such a large part of her life with the boys. Lois absolutely loved camping and, during the summer, headed out with the boys on many weekends to local West Michigan campgrounds for some back to nature family enjoyment. This included campfire cooking, hikes to explore new trails and retrieve firewood, and adventures to enjoy the numerous Lake Michigan beaches nearby. Times were filled with activity then with both her sons continuing to grow and develop and presenting all the usual challenges of two high energy teenage boys. Sadness struck again, however, in the form of the suicide death of Warren at only 20 years of age on July 31, 1980. In addition to the obvious family impact, this event deeply affected many in the small close-knit town of Fruitport where Warren was very popular. Life moved on for Lois but in a very different way. With increased sensitivity, passion, and awareness to the emotional challenges of other families having experienced suicide, Lois became the founder and coordinator of the local Chapter of the Survivors of Suicide (SOS) support group. There was an accomplished local writer, Al Schneider, who learned of this organization and decided to pay a visit during one of their meetings to better understand how people dealt with suicide through support group interactions. More later on Mr. Schneider.. Lois also now acquired a strong desire to explore family Genealogy. She devoted much time, including travel to New York State and Eastern Canada, researching her Mothers (Blakeley) side of her family. She single-handedly traced her heritage back to a Scotsman named James Blackly who emigrated from Scotland to Ireland to England to the Colonies. In addition, Lois learned that she was a U.E.L, a direct descendant of a man who was loyal to and fought for the Queen during the revolutionary war a fact that Lois found very exciting. Genealogy continued to be one of her passions for many years and brought her much satisfaction. Lois continued her adventurous spirit and enjoyed her many travels, the most daring and global of which was a trip to Taiwan in 1988 for a two-week visit with Bill, who was there on a work assignment. She enjoyed sightseeing through much of Kaohsiung, Taiwan, while traveling on the back of a motor scooter! Lois was always incredibly active through her volunteer work with the Migrant Mentoring Program, Crisis Intervention Program of Ottawa County, tutoring roles with Project Literacy, and Project Hope, and with continued work as Facilitator for SOS. Lois experienced extreme happiness when Bill met a lovely young lady, Robin Dehart, and announced their desire to marry in 1995. Lois now had a daughter-in-law whom she loved dearly. Then, over the next 9 years, Robin delivered four wonderful grandchildren (Nicholas, Mary Rose, Jack, and Olivia) and Lois quickly became a wonderful grandmother to these new blessings from Heaven. The Grandchildren always knew their Gramma would have some board games or card games to play when they came to visit. Their favorite was Old Maid. With Bill now living in Dallas, Texas, and the ongoing maintenance demands of the house becoming overwhelming, Lois decided to sell in the late 90s and move to Liberty Woods, a warm and friendly Senior Housing Co-Op in Spring Lake. She remained there for many years and made some very close friendships. The year 2002 proved to be a significant one for Lois. It was during the West shore Symphony seasons of that year that Lois and Al Schneider had their first date. Apparently Lois made an impression on this writer when he made that initial visit to her SOS meeting mentioned above. Both enjoyed the symphony almost as much as they enjoyed each others company and, before long, Lois found that she had acquired not one, but two new interests. The first date led to a second and a third and, as time went by, Lois and Al formed a relationship that brought two different perspectives together. His friends became hers, her friends became his, and two separate lives were united. It is often true that the smallest incidents became the most significant as we think back on time spent with loved ones. There was a Mickey Mouse watch the first birthday gift Al gave to Lois. She would have accepted it graciously, even without the note at the bottom of the box indicating there was another, more fitting watch waiting in the wings. It wasnt the type of watch, but the giver of the watch that was important to Lois. In this, as in everything else, she had her eye on what counted most. One of the things that counted most to Lois was doing extraordinary things for the people she loved. She often showed her creative side in planning and carrying out celebrations for the festive occasions. One January, in honor of Als birthday, Lois made arrangements for dinner followed by a horse-drawn carriage ride through the streets of Muskegon! It was a lovely evening that neither Al nor Lois would ever forget. Neither Lois nor Al enjoyed spending undue time in the kitchen; instead, they liked to sample area restaurants and particularly enjoyed catching a meal with friends. Quiet evenings watching videos or playing 14 (while in the company of the cats) were common, and the occasional road trip made for a nice diversion from their daily routine. Lois accompanied Al to Gospel music concerts, while he went with her to visit places from her past, like the eastern side of Michigan and Beaver Island. A recent visit to Hack-ma-Tack Restaurant near Cheboygan brought back memories for Lois, as she once worked as a waitress there. She was excited to talk with the current staff and, when asked, was delighted to share her Hack-ma-Tack experiences as a way of preserving the institutions history. Other trips included a visit to the Shakespeare Festival at Stratford. With a shard love of literature, Lois and Al cherished this experience as a highlight of their time spent together. Unfortunately, not every trip had the same happy outcome. With increasing concern over Loiss declining health, the couple traveled to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota in 2006. This visit provided some answers but, at the same time, seemed to raise even more questions. Lois was now struggling to combat a progressive lung disease that limited her mobility and required the use of supplemental oxygen. Lois and Al, determined to make the most of their time together, affirmed their relationship in a ceremony of the rings facilitated by Loiss close friend Keith Bovee. This commitment signified the steadfast nature of the love and affection they shared. In late 2007, Al relocated to an apartment in proximity to Lois. The two were looking forward to relaxing, spending time together, and enjoying the days ahead, but this was not to be for nearly as long as they anticipated. Sadly, Lois died on Thursday, January 24, 2008, at the age of 76. Lois was a woman who never chased fortune and fame, a woman who only cared about making a difference to others. She was a beloved wife, mother, grandmother, and friend, who gave of herself so willingly, graciously, and selflessly. What a difference she made to all who knew her! She taught us the meaning of love and is now only a memory away. Lois is survived by 1 son, William Paul (Robin) Steury of NC; 4 grandchildren, Nicholas, Mary Rose, Jack & Olivia; 1 brother, Robert Manchee of FL; her special friend, Al Schneider & his daughter, Gloria Jasperse. She was preceded in death by a son, Warren Kenneth & her loving cat, Jefferson. A memorial service will be held Friday, February 1, 2008, 1:00 PM at Clock Chapel - Fruitport with visitation on Thursday, 4-7 PM. Memorial donations may be made to the West Michigan Survivors of Suicide. Please visit www.lifestorynet.com to share a memory or sign the online guest book.